informant38
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...But of these sophisms and elenchs of merchandise I skill not...
Milton, Areopagitica

Except he had found the
standing sea-rock that even this last
Temptation breaks on; quieter than death but lovelier; peace
that quiets the desire even of praising it.

Jeffers, Meditation On Saviors


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29.11.03

Ω{I don't have any real first-hand prison experience, a little jail time over the years, more than most but not nearly as much others. So I don't have personal experience in this life to back up the image, but the image is clear and the vibe of it as real as anything ever is. The take down. How much lust there is for the pure and undamaged in the caged souls. That one figure, the aristocrat, the white woman among the natives, the missionary, the blonde from 'Freaks', or Jesus for that matter, the better-than-the-rest brought down and picked apart by the mob, martyred by the pack, the clot of hope-relinquished fallen. It's 'The Little Girl Who Trod On A Loaf', it's hell. It's the demons of hell and their hatred of anything that reminds of them of where they are and how far away redemption will be now.
I saw RFK Jr. on Hannity/Colmes tonight, beleaguered and assaulted, offering sincere truth for simpering lie.
Just before that, I'd hit a reference online to Waterkeepers, one of his many projects.
The presence of people of integrity, here and now, is what makes it impossible for me to give up entirely, is what keeps me at this, and in my own real life, refusing surrender.
I have some theories about what's causing this seeming inversion of metaphysical stance, where the insane destruction of life is wearing the colors of God and goodliness, and the defenders of the living world have to fight through a gantlet of screaming incubi to get from one day to the next. But nothing of what I think about it, nothing of what I see or have seen changes the main step. We have to give everything we have to the battle. Each in our way, with what we have before us.
Most of us won't ever know what finally happened, or how it all worked out. That's the nature of real sacrifice, and hope.}


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