Informant38

MIND CONTROL: The Later Years When Candy finally wanted out of "her service", Jensen began to plant suicide commands in her subconscious; Jensen provided very detailed instructions on where, when and how. Jensen commanded that she go to Nassau, call him the next morning after her arrival. The phone call was necessary so that Jensen could command "Arlene" to "walk the body to an out-of-the-way cliff." The only thing that saved Candy was that thirty days before "Arlene" was going to take a dive off a cliff in Nassau, the floodgates of Candy's subconscious broke through and she started to break some of the rules of her program.

{for years after the almost successful suicide attempt I made in 1975, I had the firm conviction that if I drowned myself, if I immersed myself in water, and breathed in, that I would not die but rather be 'reborn' be remade in a more powerful and invulnerable form. this is real. I came close a few times. especially i remember in 76 at a pool near my home being very close. it's still there in a way. but fading now. much that was inexplicable is close to being clear. because it's so late.
that all this is mixed in with so much nonsense, so much fantasy and delusion, is sad of course. and shame is always so close, shame at being vulnerable. shame at being.....what this is.}